Saturday, June 18, 2011

I'm Grateful for Mistakes.

Today I realized almost everything in life can be considered a mistake, a moment of weakness or passion, a moment where someone didn't think. I was one of those moments. I wasn't planned. But I'm thankful that I was given a chance to make mistakes of my own, to get lost in the moment, to not think; to have passions and weaknesses. I am thankful to be alive.

There are a lot of times where I let it hurt, that I was considered a mistake. A lot of times when I get angry at people for being human, for being too involved in other things, or not involved enough for others. I forget how human I am. How every little thing is a trick of fate, a maybe slightly planned, but still kind of accident happening. I forget that sometimes, accidents are the best parts of life.

And then somedays, I remember. I look at my nieces and nephews, my siblings, the man I love, and realize that they were never really planned. That at some point, someone might've considered them a mistake, or a failed judgement. And I'm so grateful for them, and the other mistakes in my life that have led me to who I am;

I'm a 19 year old girl with a passion for reading that came from so much time feeling alone, but a passion that gave me a belief in second chances, and led to the renewal of a relationship with my father and my brothers and sisters.

I'm a writer and a musician, because I failed a computer class and stumbled into a passion that lifts my heart and keeps me alive when I was put into a choir. A choir that gave me the family I didn't feel like I had, and gave me motivation and pride in myself, my abilities, and a love for travel and culture.

I'm a pagan, because I felt like I didn't fit in with other religion, and it's opened doors to me and opened me up to new friends and new expiriences.

I forget sometimes that mistakes gave me the best parts of my life. And today, I remember to be grateful. Because if it wasn't for lapses in judgement, I wouldn't know the love of my life, and I would never have met him, because I wouldn't exist. Today, I'm grateful for love.

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